The Other Woman

I wanted to pour this out since I don’t know when. I don’t know if it’s because of guilt. Conscience maybe? But how can you possibly call a love so great ‘wrong’?

It was not love at first sight. It even had to go through a lot of impolite stares and eyeball rolling for me to admit that I’ve been hit. And as the rain fell on the corrugated galvanized iron roof, so did my heart on his sexy smile complete with his perfect set of teeth.

I’ve tried to deny my impulses at first but my olfactory nerves send signals to my brain that tells me how good he smells even when he’s all covered with sweat. Even my optical nerves find it difficult not to stare. Whew! It seemed that I’ve come to realize for the first time why the good Lord had endowed me with such great senses – except for my common sense that I’ve started to bottle up.

Long before I knew him, she was there already. She had been his life. She was his first love. When he first introduced me to her, she just eyed me suspiciously as if she was already expecting I’d take him away from her even though at that time we were just friends. But we all know how friends could get so close (most abused foundation of love?). And it didn’t take too long for us to realize that we couldn’t stay as friends any longer. And though I prided myself with being intelligent and making right decisions always, I didn’t quite calculate the amount of beer that could affect my reasoning, judgment, and sense of righteousness.

I got pregnant. She got mad. He tried hard to explain what happened but she just chose to play deaf. He moved in our house after we told my parents about my condition. It was hard for him – for both of us actually. We were both graduating when this mess happened. It was a good thing my tummy was not very noticeable. We still continued going to school. And even though my parents were supporting us (I’m the only girl in the family), he still  tried hard to find a job.

"We named her Helena – the first woman he loved."

Slowly, things started to put on a normal footing. But I could sometimes catch him in deep thought and staring at nothing. I knew he was thinking of her. And though he never told me, I know he still visits her sometimes – in hope that she might forgive us. He loved her all his life and I just cannot compete with that.

We got married after graduation.  Two months after that, I gave birth to a healthy baby girl. We named her Helena – the first woman he loved. Before leaving the hospital, we learned that Helena was ill.

We decided to visit her. I waited outside the room while he talked to her.

“You look good. How’s the baby?” she asked.

“Five pounds. Baby girl. Are you okay?” he sat by her side.

“Aww, don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine. I just need a little rest. Is your wife still mad at me? I hope not. You chose her over me.”

“She was never mad at you. I’m sorry I was very stubborn at that time. I know she understands you better now that we have a baby.”

“I’m sorry too.” She said blinking away her tears.

“I’m sorry that I needed to choose that time but she needed me – she and the baby. And I know she could take care of me like how you have taken care of me mom.” He cried.

“I missed you calling me that.” She cried as he hugged her.

I waited for a while and then I entered carrying the baby. She looked at me and then motioned for me to bring the baby to her.

“Come here. Let me look at her.” She held my hand as if saying how sorry she was. I smiled at her.

She then asked, “What should I call her?”

“We named her after you mom. Helena.” I answered and then I looked at my husband smiling at the two women in his life and then at the little angel. twinx

The Mirror

That morning at my desk, I found a card and a gift-wrapped package at my chair. The card was signed, love - Willela, and the gift was a small mirror.


Willela is my classmate. She is a tall and thin girl. She looks so pale you'd think she's in bad health. But she's not! She's just the exact opposite of the way she looks. She is jolly and energetic. Her laugh always echoes through the four walls of the room. She always leaves short messages of appreciation. And I think it's crazy. It's weird.


I took for granted the mirror she had given me. I can only remember it if I have to powder my face. The card seems less important too. I had hopes that she would soon stop giving me silly notes and gifts because my bag was getting full with 'trash' from her. But even though I find it stupid to receive such silly gifts, I don't know why I'm still keeping those things they say only 'sentimental fools' keep.


Then one December morning, I received a hug and a kiss on my cheek from her, a kiss that triggered the soul inside me. A kiss that made me feel, I would never see her again. And suddenly, I felt the urge to kiss her too. I smiled at her, gave her a big hug and a shy kiss on her cheek.

"Among the pile of cards, I saw the mirror. I stared at it and saw her staring back."

The next day, I felt uncomfortable.. something was missing. And then, a classmate told me that Willela was gone. She had committed suicide. She couldn't take it anymore to see her parents quarreling's and shouting's at each other. She couldn't take the pain that her parents were separating this Christmas.


It put a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes, as I grasped the news. Tears! I suddenly felt funny. I'm crying? I'm crying for a girl whom I thought was crazy and weird?


Yeah, I was crying for a girl whom I thought was strong. But maybe I was really crying for myself. I was such a self-centered person. She considered me as her friend, yet I treated her as a mere classmate and as someone who pisses me off with those crazy notes and gifts. I should have been the one giving those things. I should have been the one who gave her hope.


I opened my bag and stared at the cards and short notes she had given me. Now, I didn't see anything crazy about these things. What I saw was the real reason why she had given them. She wanted to be given the love she had been longing for. The love she couldn't find at home. The love which I failed to give.


Among the pile of cards, I saw the mirror. I stared at it and saw her staring back. She made me see my mistakes. But now that I have come to realize these things, she had gone away. So now tell me, how I'll be able to spend a happy Christmas without my mirror? LSZ

Mikaela

I have a pet. Her name is Mikaela. At first, I didn't like her. She arrived at home one day looking terribly annoying. She just stared at me, boldly admitting she doesn't like me. She would bark around the house and I wouldn't care as long as she's not doing me any harm. Everybody at home loves her, except me. I don't hate her. I just don't like her. But one Sunday afternoon, Mom told me to take Mikaela for a walk in the park.

At first, we just walk there not making a sound. It went on every Sunday. The funny thing is, I find myself already enjoying our walks every Sunday afternoon. I've finally learned to like her. She's not that bad after all. She even helped me get noticed by my long-time crush next door. She took his baseball cap one day and gave it to me. The next thing i know, he was already standing in front of me wearing his picture-perfect smile.

Everybody loves Mikaela and I take extra credit for being with her. We always get attention. We were inseparable. But everything changed one day when she met Gian, the german shepherd my aunt left. She went on vacation and left her dog at home.

Now, we would go to the park but with Gian around. I noticed Mikaela giving Gian shy smiles, wagging her tail when Gian is around. I wanted her to feel loved. Now, they would go to the park alone.

Gian became Mikaela's obsession. She couldn't eat without him around, couldn't sleep without Gian by her side, wouldn't go out if Gian's not tailing behind. My pet Mikaela is becoming a lovesick dog.

What now when my aunt arrives and takes her dog? What will happen to her when Gian leaves? I know I'm partly to be blamed because I've let her world revolved around Gian when I know he can't stay. Somebody owns him. And soon she would take him back. And there's nothing Mikaela could do. Gian was never hers.

"Sometimes I'm thinking of giving her away, but who would love her now?" 

What now if she gets pregnant? Poor puppies. They will never get to see their father. Poor Mikaela for not thinking of the consequences of her actions. Well, what do I expect? She's a dog. She doesn't know what being smart is all about. I could have been the smart one here but I was not able to stop her from her foolishness. Besides being hardheaded, Mikaela treats me like I don't exist when Gian is around. I understand. But I couldn't take her acting so dumb.

Sometimes I'm thinking of giving her away, but who would love her now? She's not the same Mikaela I've known. I just wanted her to feel loved and needed but she made one grave mistake. She didn't love herself first. And now, she's devastated.

She knows I'll always be there for her. I'll always be around when no one's in sight. I'll give her comfort when she's sad, lift her up when she's down. But she must learn to love herself first because even if she's my bestfriend, I just can't learn to love a bitch! LSZ